What is the definition of ‘seduce’?
Gone are the days of cavemen when courtship relied more upon subdue than seduce. ‘Seduce’ has a few, sometimes disturbing definitions we, however, shall take the morally most acceptable definition; ‘seduce’ means to entice someone that you genuinely like into sexual activity.
Seduction will only be acceptable if, for the purposes of this article, the woman is a willing participant in the physical union; no force, threats or outright dam lies!
OK, that’s set the boundaries; now let’s find out how to woo and seduce a woman.
RULE NUMBER ONE!
Do not start by hurling, ill-thought through, crude words of innuendo at the poor girl; stay away from sexist comments that involve direct reference to her, albeit luscious, body parts.
Start to build a relationship, get to know one another; take your time. By all means pass a complimentary eye-flicker over her body, she’ll pick up on this without feeling embarrassed or threatened. Resist the initial urge to plunge your eyes deep into her cleavage!
RULE NUMBER TWO!
Pay attention, smile, keep eye contact, ask questions and make sure that bloody phone is turned off!
Make sure of your ground; whatever you do don’t tell an inappropriate story, especially that one about the nun and the vegetable patch. Just be careful what comes out of your mouth.
Find out her likes, dislikes and concentrate the conversation on topics of common interests; she might not care less that Man U have signed a new goalkeeper. I’m sure however that you will listen intently to the in-depth description of her pressed wild flower collection.
Keep eye contact, looking away will imply a lack of interest, especially if you’re looking at your watch. Smile, return conversation with perhaps a relevant funny anecdote; no not the nun joke!
Don’t forget, she’s probably testing you using similar tactics.
RULE NUMBER THREE!
Look interested and be complimentary, but don’t overdo it!
Complimentary and subtle, ‘I really like that dress, Harrods?’ OK, a bit corny but somewhat more acceptable than … ‘nice tits love!’ Although if you can make that work, good luck.
The biggest compliment you can give a girl is to pay attention and ask questions relevant to her; ask about her family, career, leisure time activities hobbies etc.
People, not just women, love to tell their story. Now, if she starts asking about your background … you’re definitely making serious progress.
In response try not to brag, or go on and on; keep it brief and try to switch the object of conversations back on to her. You really like this girl, so be seen to absorb yourself in everything said, every last detail … remember your aim is to seduce this gorgeous creature.
Maybe time to pick up the pace.
RULE NUMBER FOUR
Your place or mine?
What next? An invite to the cinema, a meal perhaps? OK, these provide great bonding opportunities and are worthwhile pre-seduction exercises; however you now really need a more intimate atmosphere, the obvious next bold step is to ask her back to your place, if you have one that’s not a rubbish tip that is.
If you take this route then make sure that the invite is for a specific purpose other than sex; maybe to see you goldfish or your rare collection of antique saucepans. By doing this you’re not generating extra anxiety. Although she has probably read the situation and is eagerly awaiting your next move.
So here it comes.
RULE NUMBER FIVE!
The subtle art of ‘closing the distance’
Right, you’ve done the ground work, at last you’re alone together. You’ve got her attention, you make her laugh and she’s at ease. The lady obviously likes you but … is she attracted to you physically?
Now is a time for self-control, stifle the urge to start ripping off clothes; any aggressive posturing or advances, including a peck on the cheek, could put your date in full retreat!
Talk something of your feelings for her, explain that you really do like her and love being with her. Don’t gush talk of love or lust, if you do, she’ll be gone faster than a rat up an aqueduct!
Be subtle, plan to draw her closer, close down that space between you. Just move ever so slightly closer to her when you speak; lower your voice, that’ll entice her even closer to listen. Perhaps invite her to look at a photo, or some other object of interest, that you can hold in your hand. Be clever and you could end up almost cheek to cheek.
You’re trying to manoeuvre towards that first gentle touch, a brush against her cheek, a brief meeting of hands; it may all feel accidental but this is the moment you’ve been planning for.
Suddenly! You touch and the tension is released in a passionate embrace; you may not have sex immediately but it’s now virtually a done deal.
Mission accomplished, your seduction tactics have worked … or were they really her tactics?
Anyway, now you can tell that awful story about the nun and the vegetable patch.